


Higgs' preemie weenie. NOT WISE TO GO THERE. this is WHY you never ever ever talk bad about Higgs.

by Dream_Seeker



Category: Death Stranding (Video Games)
Genre: Other
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-30
Updated: 2020-08-30
Packaged: 2021-03-06 23:55:13
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,008
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26197474
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Dream_Seeker/pseuds/Dream_Seeker
Summary: If the title isn't good enough....Kaci ran her mouth.Kaci dun goofed.=OR=If something seems TOO bullshit to be true,it's probably true.HIGGS IS 100% IN CHARACTER HERE.
Kudos: 3





	Higgs' preemie weenie. NOT WISE TO GO THERE. this is WHY you never ever ever talk bad about Higgs.

**Author's Note:**

> I have this unnatural obsession with Higgs and ofc's.  
> And smut. Plenty of Smut. Not here. This coullllllld go smut but it may just be a one shot. Your comments will decide the fate on where this will go. One shot or xyz shots? 
> 
> Also, I can SO see the following happen. You KNOW there was at least one stupid npc who pulled this shit.  
> I'm stepping up to tell that tale. Because I can.

The bitch had been talking shit about Higgs for a good long amount of time. Mostly it was eye rolling bullshit. Sometimes it was fucking annoying. Rarely, it made Higgs wish he could go kill a bitch. 

And then the ultra rare moment came. 

The last straw. 

The final nail. 

  
"Higgs, your 'dearest fan' has a new rumor about you. THIS one is.. well... don't kill the messenger." The Demen who always brought Higgs Intel and the like was standing in Higgs' personal quarters in the Demens Camp. Most of the news given was the normal bullshit, until... "She's telling everyone - and I mean _everyone_ \- that you're a complete joke and the reason you act like such a monster is merely to make up for having a pinky sized cock. Then she's saying that's now a lie as you don't even _have_ a cock but a clit."

The final nail.

Higgs blinked.

His face paled then curled into a snarl. 

His eyes grew black with rage.

And a second later Higgs had jumped.

  
He never saw this Kaci bitch before but he wouldn't have much trouble at all finding her. He could find anyone. He also knew how to disguise himself well. Actually, his Bridges Porter uniform had worked _so_ well that he even fooled Sam Porter Bridges - and Higgs had been right in front of Sam.

The last place the bitch had been seen was a small Village South East of Mountain Knot City so Higgs jumped a few minutes walk from there, taking a few seconds to use some Chiral energy to switch his usual all black attire for the Porter uniform. He pulled the hat down so his forehead tattoos were hidden and headed into the Village. He walked slowly, as if he had all the time in the world, and strolled into the first Tavern he found.

"Hey! You're that Porter from Bridges!" A large, bearded man called out. "You brought that shipment of Bras and Panties here last week!" Everyone in the bar turned to look at him and Higgs groaned inwardly. Oh well. Best way to hide was in plain sight. 

"Yeah, that was me," (No it hadn't) Higgs nodded, calm as still water. "Sam Porter Bridges was _supposed_ to deliver them instead but he felt embarrassed and so," Higgs held his hands up in a 'what can ya do' shrug, "I stepped up and brought them. Now don't go telling Sam I told you that. He'd kill me and I kinda like my job and my life." He chuckled and got the same in return. "There... wasn't a problem with them, was there?" He put a worried look on his face.

  
"Nah, mate. There weren't any complaints from anyone, at least as far as I know." The large man said, looking around at the others. "Just mentioned it cuz I recognized ya, is all."

"Yeah, well I'd stay and chat but I better go." Higgs said, holding his hands up. "I have to work, you know. Deliveries never end. Just stopped in to get a drink to wet the whistle."

"Sure thing, mate." The large man said, turning away.

Higgs let out a nod in farewell and ordered a drink.

Once he'd finished it, he left the Tavern and walked up the street. He was looking for the right kind of people who would be the Village gossips. It didn't take long at all. Higgs found a group of three women and a man talking outside of another Tavern and approached them, buying a round of drinks for the group.

"Hey, guys," he said, "I'm a friend of Sam's."

They all looked at him with blank faces. "You know, Sam? Sam Porter Bridges?" All four looked confused for a second before recognition dawned on their faces.

"Oh, _that_ Sam!" The woman in the middle said, "Yeah, he's a great guy. Just real quiet."

  
"That he is." Higgs smiled as he tapped the Bridges insignia on his shirt. "He's a good guy to work with. Anyhoo, I've been attempting to locate someone. I have an important message she needs to get asap, but I'm having a hard time finding her. I got directed here."

"Who are you seeking?" One of the women asked and Higgs pretended to think. "She has long black hair, very green eyes. I believe her name is Tracy?... No. Stacy? I _think_ that's it."

  
"Oh, you mean _Kaci_!" The woman said. "She's a whore over at Madam Moonlight's place."

"Thanks," Higgs said, handing the group another round of drinks. "Here's to Sam Porter Bridges and his impressive deliveries." He raised his glass and they all drank.

Higgs made his way across the way to Madam Moonlight's place and walked inside. The place was packed with people and he had to shove his way through to the bar.

  
' _Perfect_ ', Higgs thought to himself as he let a smile touch his lips. ' _Couldn't ask for a better set up if I had planned this myself'._

He went to the counter and the man behind it looked puzzled. "I wasn't expecting any cargo, Porter."

Higgs blushed as he checked around as if not wanting any one to hear him. "Oh, I'm not here to deliver. Not in the _usual_ meaning, that is." He winked. "Been on the go for 2 weeks now and was told this place is highly recommended for a little R&R. Can you recommend any one? I'm rather partial to long dark hair." 

The bartender seemed to understand as he looked around and pointed to a girl sitting by herself. "She fit your style? Ain't sitting with anyone so she's no doubt open for business." He winked. "Her name's Kaci."

"Thanks, she'll definitely fill the needs I have." Higgs said as he handed the bartender a small bag. "Keep the change." He made his way over to the girl and sat down next to her.

"Hey there, Beautiful," he said, "How'd you like to make some money?"

She looked at him with a bored expression. "Do I _look_ like I need money?"

Higgs looked her over and smiled, "Not at all, but perhaps you'd like some companionship? I've been on the road for two weeks now and would love to relax. Are you... um... available?"

Kaci looked him over and then shrugged, "Sure. Why not. You look like you'd be fun." She gave him a charming and cute grin and Higgs returned it.

"So... Uh.. How does this all work? First time here."

"Well, it's real simple. First we-"

She was cut off by another whore and her customer, both of them drunk. "Kaci!!!! I was telling my good friend here about what you said about that Piggs guy. Tell him!"

Higgs' was able to stifle a growl and patiently waited to hear it. This was going to be good.

"Oh, it's nothing much," Kaci said, waving her hand. "I had just said how I attempted to pity fuck him and he was completely terrible at sex...plus the poor sweet thing is severely lacking in the big boys area." She held up her little finger with a smirk, "Like I said, doll. It's _nothing much_. I couldn't even pity fuck the poor man-baby cuz there was literally nothing I could work with. Never felt so fucking sorry for a guy in my entire _life_. And his name's Higgs, not Piggs. Christ, gotta leave the guy with _SOME_ dignity, after all. Piggs." She snorted laughter. "That's funny."

Higgs face never changed expression but inside he was dangerously pissed off and his fists clenched under the table. He wanted to hurt her. He wanted to make her scream and cry and ruin her pretty face and fuck her brutally over and over and - 

"I swear I heard someone say he controls BT'S and Timefall and is _real_ dangerous...." Kaci's whore friend mused which only made Kaci laugh outright. 

"Oh come ON now. That's complete bullshit. No one can do that. He's prolly spreading those lies to cover up for his preemie weenie. Can't blame the poor son of a bitch. Anyway, I'm kinda _busy_ here," she waved a hand toward Higgs and her friend nodded and left. 

"Sorry about that," Kaci said to Higgs, flipping her hand a little as she took another drink. 

' _Oh, darlin, you have noooooo idea just how sorry you're about to be_.' Higgs thought to himself as he grinned at her, "It's okay. Wow. Is it true?! That guy has a tiny one?" 

"Honey, you have _no_ idea. Couldn't even pity fuck him. Poor thing'll never get laid except by his own finger tips." Kaci made a jerk off motion. "Enough about teeny weenies, though. I'm sure _you've_ got plenty of size to satisfy. Got somewhere we can go, or would you like to go upstairs?"

Higgs smiled a friendly smile. "Well, if you don't mind a walk about 5 minutes from here, there's a real cozy Timefall shelter for us Porters. No one else would be using it. Comfy bed, a hot shower, music, and you and me. Can be as loud and wild as we want, too. No one will hear a thing."

Kaci pondered it then smiled. "Sounds great! I _love_ when I can be extra loud."

"Oh, I'll definitely have you screaming, sweetheart." Higgs replied as he reached over and gently squeezed her hand before rising. "Shall we?"

"No price discussion?" She asked with a raised brow and Higgs winked. "I'll make it VERY worth your time. I'd assume for a gorgeous treat such as yourself, 500 would suffice?"  
  
Her eyes nearly popped out of their sockets. "That's like.... Enough for an entire week!"

"Oh believe me, I have very strong stamina. And I got no where pressing to be." He gave her the 500 and she blinked. "No shit... Well, I'll be _sure_ to take extra special care of you. You won't be disappointed at all. I'm Kaci, by the way. What's your name? I like to know the name I'll be moaning, after all."

"It's Peter. Peter Boson. And don't you worry none, Kaci. I am one hundred percent positive I won't be disappointed at all. And I promise you'll definitely have memories you'll vividly remember for the rest of your life."

"Well, I'll hold you to that promise, Peter. Now lead the way. I'm all yours." Kaci said, over the moon with happiness.

"You're _definitely_ all mine. We're gonna have a _lot_ of fun. Who knows. I may make you my favorite girl and come visit you a lot." Higgs took her hand and raised it to his lips without breaking eye contact. 

"And a gentleman at _that?_ I'm _already_ impressed, Peter." The girl smiled happily. 

They left the Moonlight and walked arm in arm out of the Village toward the Timefall shelter.

Making small talk, Higgs soon had Kaci distracted by laughing but after a while, she looked confused. "Hey... shouldn't that shelter be close?"

"Oh, it's a _littttttle_ farther than what I said it would be, darlin." Higgs smiled. Kaci looked a little unsettled and glanced back toward the Village.

"Hey. I wanna show you a little somethin', Kaci...."

"What?" She asked and he winked as he snapped his fingers. Instantly his usual attire was back on and he grabbed her arm tightly.

"P-Peter?!" She gasped as she tried in vain to free her arm.

"Now I wasn't _too_ honest with ya back there, darlin', and I do hope you can find it in your sweet little heart to forgive me. Now me? Heh. I'm not _too_ much of the forgiving sort myself. Oh! Where _are_ my manners? Let me properly introduce myself." He gave her an emotionless smile. "The name's Higgs. The Particle of God which Permeates allllll Existence." His eyes were solidly locked on hers as he raised his hand and whispered, "Boom" - and it began to rain.

He smiled coldly as Kaci paled hard and began screaming bloody murder. 

Higgs roughly jerked her into his arms and he jumped them away. 


End file.
